"Dad's Porno Mag" (Robison Records; 2000)

Reviewed by R. Scott Bolton

It's "Dad's Porno Mag," not "Your Best Porno Mag" (the one your mom threw away in that Beastie Boys' song), but that doesn't really matter. What matters is that "Dad's Porno Band" rocks. 

Comprised of members from Ratt, L.A. Guns, Alice Cooper's band and Slash's Snakepit, Dad's Porno Mag is a no-apologies blast of solid rock'n'roll. 

Rock'n'roll should always be fun, no matter what U2 tells you. Fortunately, Dad's Porno Mag knows that. They may not always know when they've gone too far, but they know how to have fun getting there.

"DPM" begins with a short little ditty called "Hello," which is interesting because the band that DPM most reminds me of - CHEAP TRICK - also begins their first album with a song called "Elo Kiddies." (In addition, the layout of DPM's CD cover vaguely looks like a photo I saw of Trick somewhere). DPM has Trick's pop sensibility; in other words, they write melodic yet crunch-heavy songs in which guitar and vocals blend together in perfect unison. "Smell My Finger" is next, and, yes, this is where the band goes too far. "Smell My Finger" may have sounded funny on paper, but it's really just crude and silly. Sample lyric: "If you think I don't like her, smell my finger." Puh-lease. Musically, it sounds pretty good. But the lyrics here sabotage the song.

Next up is "The Call" and, after just the first few notes, the obnoxious chorus of "Smell My Finger" is forgotten. "The Call" is a driving, guitar-heavy number whose crunching guitar sounds blast loudly and proudly from the speakers. And the rest of the CD follows suit with the exception of "The Ballad of Sandra Bullock" which brings the band's big sound down a notch and doesn't make much sense lyrically and "V" which brings that big sound down a couple of notches. 

Guitar driven rock is making a huge comeback, thank God, and Dad's Porno Mag make the best of it. It's rock'n'roll at its purest and, these days, who can't use a big dose of that?

Dad's Porno Mag: Ryan Roxie, guitar/vocals; Keri Kelli, guitar/vocals; Mike Fasano, drums; Stefan Adika, bass. 

Rating Guide:

A classic. This record will kick your ass.

Killer. Not a classic but it will rock your world.

So-so. You've heard better.

Pretty bad. Might make a nice coaster.

Self explanatory. Just the sight of the cover makes you wanna hurl.

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Copyright 2004 by R. Scott Bolton. All rights reserved.