"Are You Prepared for Popo Love?" (Ohne Maulkorb; 2006)

Reviewed by Christopher J. Kelter

After I pretty much trashed G.F.P.M.’s “Mushroom Cloud Messiah” I was pretty sure I’d never get an opportunity to review their new material. Well, I was wrong. G.F.P.M. have returned with their latest effort “Are You Prepared for Popo Love?” This new disc features the term ‘natural porn grinder’ in prominent display on the inside sleeve. This term was used on their demo tape and suspiciously avoided on “Mushroom Cloud Messiah.” You need only check out the cover to get the feeling that G.F.P.M. are trying to get their point across literally and figuratively.

Anyhoo … what is it with the term “porno grind?” For the life of me I’m still trying to figure that one out. I’ve fancied myself a bit more knowledgeable about a broader set of genres/sub-genres than the average metalhead and I just don’t understand “porno grind.”

“Are You Prepared for Popo Love?” is actually less irritating than G.F.P.M.’s previous release “Mushroom Cloud Messiah.” In all honesty, “Are You Prepared for Popo Love?” is hardly irritating at all. Much of this has to do with my own improved understanding and appreciation of grindcore rather than anything that G.F.P.M has done.

Regardless, “Are You Prepared for Popo Love?” shows improvements all around. The songwriting shows a sharper focus with greater emphasis on straight-on grindcore and less emphasis (occasionally non-existent) on the meandering sludgy doom parts that polluted their previous release. The disc is brief – the nine tracks move in a brisk twenty minutes. The musical and rhythmic variety within tracks and across the album actually proves the old adage that “a grind band is only as good as their slow parts,” but I may actually be selling G.F.P.M. a little short on that count.

For fun, I presume, G.F.P.M. covers Ween’s “Spinal Meningitis.” It is, as you might guess, unrecognizable.

Overall, kudos to G.F.P.M. for a much more consistent disc and generally more satisfying musical outing with “Are You Ready for Popo Love?”

G.F.P.M. is Dany on guitars and screams, Linga on bass and vocals, and Manu on drums.

For more information, check out http://www.gfpm.at.tf/

"Mushroom Cloud Messiah" (Ohne Maulkorb; 2004)

Reviewed by Christopher J. Kelter

Mushroom Cloud Messiah? From the title alone it sounds like death metal for the apocalypse. Even the artwork displays a skull melting in a psycho-analeptic cocktail induced haze. G.F.P.M present their version of the end of the world with music that jerks back and forth between doomy sludge and crazed grindcore. Although "Mushroom Cloud Messiah" leans more heavily toward grindcore, the see-saw effect is actually entertaining, but only in an irritating way.

The music is fairly well recorded as buzz-saw guitars and fuzzy bass push and shove their way through the machine gun drumming – that would be the grindcore songs. During the more sludgy, doomy tracks the band heaves with the conviction of a sick puppy not knowing whether to throw up on the carpet or on the linoleum kitchen floor. Clearly there was not a premium on the vocal recordings as the vocals are a rushed messed of screaming and shouts – and they’re buried in the mix to boot. 

The band is at its best from a listening standpoint when it slows down and lets the music ring out. However, G.F.P.M. needs to decide if it wants to pursue grindcore or doomy sludgy death metal. Currently, they're succeeding at neither and the band might well focus on one style to conquer. If I were the band's next producer I’d be telling the trio to focus on grindcore despite the fact that they'd be crushed under the weight of trying to compete with Nasum or Pig Destroyer.

"Mushroom Cloud Messiah" was produced by G.F.P.M. and Rudi B.

G.F.P.M. is Dany on guitar and all screams, Linga on bass and additional vocals, and Manu on drums.

For more information, check out http://www.gfpm.at.tf/

"Tape La Muerte" (Demo; 1998)

Reviewed by R. Scott Bolton

You gotta love a band that calls their music "harsh, groovy folk metal," "gore, fuckin' porno metal" or noisy-sound performance." Austria's G.F.P.M. does just that. 

I don't know where to begin in describing the sound of G.F.P.M. This demo cassette (jokingly referred to as "Tape La Muerte") contains six tracks, each of which is played at a blistering pace, features vocals that are just this side of death metal growls, and are nothing short of brutal. And, with titles like "Penislovedoll," how can you not love it? What this band lacks in songwriting skill, they more than make up with pure, raw emotion.

G.F.P.M. has been around since the mid-90s. At the very beginning, they were a five piece band. In 1998, the band shrunk down to two guys. They borrowed a drummer to make this demo.

G.F.P.M.: Linga, bass/vocals; Dany, guitar/vocals; Mastic Man, drums.

For more information, check out http://www.gfpm.at.tf/

Rating Guide:

A classic. This record will kick your ass.

Killer. Not a classic but it will rock your world.

So-so. You've heard better.

Pretty bad. Might make a nice coaster.

Self explanatory. Just the sight of the cover makes you wanna hurl.

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Copyright © 2006 by R. Scott Bolton. All rights reserved.
Revised: 10 Jul 2022 15:03:27 -0400.