"The Last Hard Men" (Spitfire)

Reviewed by Snidermann

Making up the personnel of The Last Hard Men are rock veterans Sebastian Bach, Kelly Deal of the Breeders, Jimmy Chamberlin of the Smashing Pumpkins and Jimmy Flemion of The Frogs. You'd think that, with this line-up, this CD couldn't possibly suck.

Surprise! It does ... and how. I have only one question for the talent behind this mess: What the fuck were you thinking?

According to the press release, this collection of tunes began with the cover of Alice Cooper's "School's Out" which was recorded for the soundtrack to the film "Scream." It should have ended there, too. The Last Hard Men, which alternates between bad phone interviews and worse songs, is a mish-mash of rock styles that just shouldn't be mixed together. Nothing here works. In fact, I'm only giving this CD the half-chainsaw mark because at least they had the good taste to cover an Alice Cooper song. Anything higher than that and I donít think I can look at myself in the mirror.

"The Last Hard Men" is just dreadful and should be avoided at all costs. I gave it several listens thinking that maybe, just maybe, it would grow on me and now I'm at the point where I'd rather stick a fork in my eye than listen to it again. I'm sorry, but it's just that bad.

The Last Hard Men are: Sebastian Bach (Vocals, Guitar); Kelly Deal (Vocals, Bass); Jimmy Chamberlin (Drums); Jimmy Flemion (Guitar, Bass).

Rating Guide:

A classic. This record will kick your ass.

Killer. Not a classic but it will rock your world.

So-so. You've heard better.

Pretty bad. Might make a nice coaster.

Self explanatory. Just the sight of the cover makes you wanna hurl.

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Copyright © 2002 by R. Scott Bolton. All rights reserved.
Revised: 28 Nov 2021 13:23:27 -0500 .